I started really feeling this urge last week to listen. To just shut up and listen!!! I wasn't sure what I was supposed to listen to but I decided I just needed to let things be, and listen.
I let there be silence in the truck as I was driving. I tried to shut out the distractions around the house (as much as you can with a five year old, a one year old, and a thirty-nine year old around.) I started reading some faith based blogs, especially those of some moms out there. I started looking up passages in the Bible. I turned the radio over to KLOVE. And I listened.
The first thing I heard was God telling me to give it ALL up. There is not one thing to give up, it's everything. I can't control it. I finally realized this on New Year's Day, in my classroom (I had left a HUGE mess the last day) with Mandisa Radio playing on Pandora. There in the middle of my classroom, I worshipped! I heard God tell me to give up control. I felt such a huge wave of relief! Like there was a burden lifted from me that was not only weighing me down, but pushing me into the ground!
Through reading of blogs this week, I came across My One Word. Instead of resolutions for the year (which most of us break by the end of the first week of the new year), how about picking a word and live that word for the year. Have you tried to come up with ONE WORD! There are many good words I mulled over. Trust- because I need to trust in Him more. Faith- because I need to have the faith in Him that will move mountains. Grow- because I need to grow in so many facets of my life. Focus- because I've allowed my life to be focused on the wrong things. Intentional- because I need to be intentional in my walk each day. See, it's hard!
I finally settled on a word:
I need to surrender to Him, The Almighty! The One who is in control! I need to let go of control, not just talk about letting go.
James 4:7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.
I need to give all my problems to Him and He will help me through.
I must always remember to call upon Him in my day of trouble, for He will deliver me, and I will glorify Him! Psalms 50:15
I went ahead and bought the book My One Word and read it in two days (for those of you who know me, you know reading anything in two days is an accomplishment for me!) It put into perspective this whole One Word concept. I didn't want to do this and then be following some cult or something.
So for this year I am going to surrender!
I want to search and seek. He will listen.